John Grover

The familiar ding of the email alert caught Robbie’s attention. He swiveled his chair away from the TV and rolled his fingers across the keyboard. Something flashed across the monitor briefly altering its appearance from a few seconds ago. His eyes instantly spotted the new mail in his inbox.

Curiosity tingled his thoughts, anticipation of something new, something he hadn’t known or read or seen fifteen minutes earlier held him in thrall. The thrill of it never failed to stop him cold no matter what he was doing. With one click of his mouse he was skimming over the email in its entirety before starting at the top again.

Robbie heard a shuffle down the stairs across from the front door. Boots hit the tile and stopped. He heard a deep sigh.

“Robbie c’mon,” Cole said. “Get offline. We’re going to be late.”

“One sec… I just need to send this to seven people.”

“Not this again.”

He could hear Cole’s impatience building, that way he would muddle about in place, his feet brushing across the floor over and over and his hands plunging in and out of his pockets. Robbie didn’t care. The email said he had seven minutes to forward it on to seven people. If he did that he would meet the love of his life.

“C’mon Cole, I have to. I could meet that special someone in seven days. If I don’t forward it, I’ll have bad luck for seven years.”

“For Crissakes, Robbie. These chain letters are bullshit. Nothing has ever come true, not money, not love, not good luck, not bad luck. It’s just stupid junior high garbage.”

“Calm down, I do it just for fun.”

“No you don’t. You really believe it. You believe everything. UFOs, Bigfoot, ghosts. All that crap.”

“So, it makes life more interesting.”

“Just don’t send it to me. I’m sick of getting them. I delete them all without opening anyway.”

Robbie’s shoulders tensed. A nervous flutter crossed his chest. His eyes widened. “You’re not supposed to do that. Never break the chain. You have no idea what could happen.”

“Robbie, enough, I swear if you send me one more…”

“Okay, okay I won’t.” He quickly replaced Cole’s name in his forward message with an online buddy out of state he’d never met and pushed send. “There. All done. Let’s go.”

“’Bout time.” Cole opened the front door for them and made sure Robbie slipped on his shoes and grabbed his wallet. “You got a real problem with those chains and forwards, man. You can’t let one of them go.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah…c’mon the love of my life is waiting.”

* * *

Cole leaned against the bar and cradled his beer. He watched people glide back and forth, some greeting each other, others slyly scoping hopeful connections. Heat filled the air, mixing with the heavy scent of perfume, cologne and sweat. The potential was endless in a bar that welcomed all.

“Hey, where’s your roomie?” A tall man with tattoos of thorns and roses on both arms asked Cole. Before Cole could answer, the man’s head swiveled to watch a thin, blonde goddess with legs for miles stroll by.

“He’s making out with some guy.”

“I don’t know. A gay dude for a roommate, you’re brave, man.”

“Robbie’s good people. I’ve known him since I was six for God’s sakes. There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

“Sure, until he strikes out here and eyes you later on, too many beers, no place to run and hide.”

“Give it up, Kev, Robbie isn’t like that, he’s like a brother. Why don’t you stop being so afraid of him.”

“I’m not afraid of him. He’s your roommate not mine.”

“Right. This night’s a bust. I’m getting tired. Guess I should try to find Robbie.”

“Good luck with that. He’s the only one that got lucky out of the three of us tonight.”

“Yeah, and he ‘s looking for the love of his life within the next two hours.”

“Huh?”

“Nothing. He’s obsessed with those stupid email chains.”

“God, I hate those things.”

“Me too. See ya man. I’m out.”

“Go get him tiger.”

“Don’t be an asshole.” Cole turned and bumped shoulders with a tall, muscular-his eyes scanned the form storming past him wearing a satiny blouse, mane of brown hair cascading down the back of the neck-woman. The woman didn’t stop or even look back as she vanished into the crowd. “Excuse me,” Cole snapped and resumed his search.

In a far corner he found Robbie staring into a glass of half melted ice and pouting. Cole walked up to him and put his hand on his shoulder. “Where’s your friend?”

“He already had a boyfriend.”

“Oh…sorry. Well, there’s always next week. Why don’t we call it a night?”

“Sounds good to me. I’ve about had it with men.”

“At least for tonight.”

“Exactly.” Cole could always get Robbie to crack a smile, no matter what was going on.

Robbie drove them home, carefully avoiding the speed traps that staked out every bar and dance club in town and pulled into the single assigned space they had in the apartment complex. That worked out just fine since Cole didn’t own a car. Trains and subways were his friend. Luckily their apartment was only two blocks away from a station.

The first thing Robbie did when they walked through the door was head straight for the computer in the open closet of the den.

“What are you doing?” Cole asked, barely able to keep his eyes open.

“I just want to check my emails.”

“You can’t be serious?”

“I won’t stay on all night.”

“Whatever, I don’t care. It’s your life.”

“Nice Cole. Isn’t it past your bed time?”

Cole shook his head and wove his hand at his ridiculous roommate before stumbling upstairs.

The room lit up with the soft glow of the monitor.

* * *

Forward this email to fifteen people within fifteen minutes and you will have good luck for fifteen years. Sent.

Forward this within the next half hour to receive amazing news within the week. Sent.

If you forward this to at least ten people you will find true love. Sent.

The good luck fairy sprinkles you with her pixie dust. Now don’t keep her for yourself send her along or you will have bad luck. Sent.

Please keep this candle lit. Sent.

Send a smile to someone you love. Sent.

Robbie glanced up at the computer’s digital clock. 4:13 am. Shit…I’m going to be a wreck tomorrow. I’d better get to bed.

He stretched and yawned, trying valiantly to pull himself away from his computer. He was like an addict just wanting one more hit. One more thrill. One more rush. The more of them he forwarded the more excited he got. The more chances there were, the more the promises would come true. The wishes. The miracles. And he could guarantee nothing bad would touch him or his friends and loved ones. He did his part. He followed the rules, he played the game, but he was losing the battle against fatigue.

Robbie’s eyes grew heavy. His head nodded once and he jumped in his chair, a quick startle that felt like he was falling then the strange jump in his legs, muscles twitching. He thought about making some coffee but lacked the ambition to get up out of his seat.

Another yawn and his eyes watered, the corners of them soaked. Cole’s right. This is crazy. Besides. There are no more tonight. The inbox is clean. Let it go…let it… what’s that?

The inbox refreshed, a beep resounded. New mail! The subject line was flanked with asterisks and read DO NOT IGNORE in all caps. Robbie’s interest was immediately piqued but he was exhausted. It was almost too much effort to direct his mouse over the mail and click it.

The screen flashed. The mail’s background was black, the type red and before he could read the first word, his eyes closed and he slumped back in his chair.

* * *

Cole lumbered downstairs, groggy, his hair tussled, a massive headache assaulting him and the first thing he saw through his hazy sight was Robbie, facedown on his keyboard. A slight snore escaped him. Cole spotted the email still open on the computer screen. The black and red color scheme glared at him in annoying mockery. He shook his head. “That’s it,” he said. “I’m unplugging this fucking thing.”

Robbie sprung to life just as Cole got down on his knees and reached for the power cord. “No wait,” he grabbed hold of Cole’s hand. “This is the last one tonight. I’ll send it right now and go to bed.”

“It’s morning, Robbie.” Cole dropped the cord and stood up.

“It is?”

“What’s wrong with you? Lately you’ve been into this shit more than ever. You barely leave the computer. I’m starting to get worried, man.”

“I can’t help it. I feel like I have to do it. I just don’t want any of them staying in my inbox.”

“Then delete them!”

“I can’t.”

“Robbie, have you taken a look at yourself lately? There are dark circles under your eyes. This is the worst I’ve ever seen you. It’s messing your life up. These last few months you’ve stopped living your life for these things.”

Robbie stared up at him speechless. His mouth hung open but his eyes skimmed the email that still begged for his forward.

“Where’s the Robbie I used to know?” Cole continued. “You’re no fun anymore. No one wants to be around you. Come out of your little closet.”

Robbie laughed out loud. His eyes widened with excitement for something other than chain emails.

“Not that one. I mean seriously, have any of these emails ever done what they said?”

Robbie shook his head. “No.”

“Of course not. Because they’re a bunch of bullshit. All of these forwards and not one thing ever came true. It’s time to stop them. They’re for lonely losers. You’re not a loser, man. I mean look at this one.” He pointed at the black email with its red type. “Oh, what are those words supposed to be like blood? Oh, I’m shaking.”

“You’re right,” Robbie giggled. “It looks like a twelve-year-old created it.”

“Exactly. Some lonely loser kid with nothing better to do. It has no more magic or threat than the Easter Bunny. Just delete it Rob, take this first step. Delete the damn thing. I wouldn’t steer you wrong, we’ve known each other almost all of our lives. Delete it. I want my friend back.”

Robbie stared at the screen. He scanned over the text again. Studied the layout, the colors. He smiled and looked up at Cole. “You’re right. Enough.” He pushed the delete key and successfully sent the mail to his trash folder. Then he powered down the computer, got out of his chair and stretched.

“Good for you.” Cole rubbed his friend’s shoulders and grinned. “C’mon, let’s go out for some breakfast.”

* * *

Robbie…Robbie…In the dream he heard someone calling his name over and over again. He just couldn’t tell who it was or where they were. It was as if his head was underwater. “Robbie!” Finally the voice woke him from his dream.

Robbie stirred, his body stretched, lethargic, aching. He glared at someone in his bedroom doorway through blurry eyes. “Cole?”

“Aren’t you going to be late for work?” Cole adjusted his tie and tucked in his shirt. “You’re usually gone long before me.”

Robbie looked around trying to shake the fuzzies from his head and settled on his clock radio. “Shit!” He jumped from the bed. “Why didn’t this thing go off?” He snatched the clock off the nightstand. “It’s set, everything’s right but it didn’t go off.” He shook the clock then slammed it back down. “Piece of junk. Thanks Cole.” He pulled his shirt off as he watched Cole smirk and vanish down the hall.

Rain poured as Robbie left the apartment and headed to his car parked on the side of the road. He hopped in as fast as he could and started off down the street. I’m going to be so late. He barreled through two intersections before the car lurched then buckled. He heard a loud pop followed by a roaring sound. Oh God no! Not now! He eased the car off the road and let it roll to a stop. A hissing sound resounded and the car hobbled like a wounded animal. Robbie turned the vehicle off and stepped out.

“Goddamit!” He watched his left front tire quickly lose all its air. It sagged onto the street, ravaged and deflated. He gave the car a swift kick as the rain soaked him. Freezing cold water rolled down his back, dripped off the tip of his nose and matted his hair to his forehead. Robbie pulled his cell from his jacket and dialed Triple A. He’d never been so pissed off before.

Upon arriving at work Robbie got his arm caught in the elevator and spent the better part of a half hour getting screamed at by his manager for missing the fiscal update meeting in which he was to give a presentation. At the end of the day his left arm was still aching from the damned elevator.

When Robbie stepped out of the building after work he collided with a bald man who knocked him to the ground. The guy never bothered to stop, he turned to look back and croaked, “Sorry, dude!”

Robbie pulled himself up, dusted off his clothes and headed for his car across the parking lot. “Could this day suck anymore? Thank Christ it’s over.” He peeled out of the lot and headed for his favorite Italian restaurant on his way home. He picked up dinner there at least two or three times a week. For a moment he felt a bit better. He was looking forward to a garlic-infused meal.

Where the hell is it? The young girl behind the counter stared as Robbie searched all of his pockets frantically for his wallet. It’s gone… it’s fucking gone. He paused, looked around at the impatient people in line behind him then remembered. “The guy who knocked me down,” he muttered under his breath. He looked up at the girl behind the register and smiled awkwardly. “You know what, I’m sorry. I’ve forgotten my wallet. Can you just cancel my order?”

The girl nodded and Robbie left the restaurant in a huff. All the way home he could not get that email out of his head. The one Cole made him delete. Why did he listen? Why? He never should have deleted it. None of this would have happened! Oh God, he could not live this day again and again… Is there still time? The email, it has to still be in his trash. He remembered that he never emptied it.

He stormed into the house and plowed past Cole to get to the computer. “Whoa, Robbie, what’s the hurry, man?”

“You have no idea what kind of day I’ve had thanks to you.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You told me to delete that email. Now, I’ve gotten a flat tire, got chewed out at work for being late and my wallet was stolen.”

“You got to be kidding me. Those are just coincidences. It wasn’t because of some stupid email.”

“Tell that to my arm, asshole.” Robbie lifted his arm and practically shoved it in Cole’s face. A long, ugly bruise ran down the length of it.

“Hey back off, man. You’re even more messed up than I thought.”

“This is all your fault. I should never have listened to you.” Robbie turned his back on Cole and sat down at the computer. It finished powering up. He signed-on to his email and searched his trash folder.

“It isn’t anyone’s fault,” Cole continued. “It’s called life. Try living it.”

“Just shut up…I’m not listening to you. Where is it, damn it.”

He finally found the all caps subject line in his trash and opened the email. The black background opened up with the blood red text.

A great evil stalks you. There is no telling what it will do to you. Forward this to one person to rid yourself of this evil. Do it now or it will be too late. If you do not want this evil to consume you pass it to another, just as this was passed to you. Do not ignore this or break the forward or it will find you.

“God, I hope I’m not too late. I was supposed to do it right away. As soon as I got it…and to only one person! It would have taken me one second. One second would have stopped all this. Why did I listen you?”

“You’re so sad, Robbie. You just had a bad day. Just like the rest of us. Now you’re right back to where you were. Pathetic.”

“Just shut up.” Robbie skimmed his address book, picked a name and forwarded the email. “There…I just hope it works. Please work.”

“Such a jerk.”

“Go to hell. Look at what you did to me.”

“We grew up together, Robbie and you’re just going to throw it away over these emails. I didn’t do anything, you jerk. You did it to yourself. It’s a wonder that you’ve made it through life this far. Enough.” Cole walked off and stomped upstairs.

Robbie sat alone in the room, staring at the computer screen. He heard Cole pace a few times above him. The silence in the apartment was deafening. He thought of the email now sent, then thought of Cole. He didn’t like leaving things this way. Robbie pulled himself from his chair and started upstairs.

He eased Cole’s half-closed door all the way open and saw him on his bed listening to his ipod. “Hey.” Robbie gestured.

Cole removed his earphones.

“I didn’t mean what I said. I was a jerk.”

“Yep.”

“I’m sorry. We’ve been friends forever, I don’t want to fight with you. Can we forget it?”

Cole rolled his eyes. “I guess so. You know you’re an idiot, right?”

“Of course. Thanks Cole for caring about my dumb ass.”

“Somebody has to.”

“Besides, everything’s going to be ok now. The email is gone and from now on everything in moderation. I’m still going to forward them, just not every second. Promise.”

“Okay Robbie. Whatever you say.”

“Seriously, I swear. Now let’s go out to the club.”

“Ok, you’re buying.”

“You got it. But you’re driving my drunk ass home. I’m going to drink until I forget all about this day from hell.”

They laughed all the way down the stairs to Robbie’s car.

* * *

The roads were still a bit slick from the rain earlier in the day but Cole handled them well. Robbie squirmed in the seat beside him and babbled nonstop. That was typical. Every time he had too much to drink you couldn’t shut him up. Cole didn’t mind. For the first time he wasn’t worried about him. He was different in the club tonight, dancing, drinking, having fun and not concerned about checking his emails. In fact he hadn’t mentioned them once. Made it all the way to two in the morning without a mention. A new record.

Cole grinned and looked up at the moon peeking through the clouds, its light cast the clouds in silver gray hues and caused shadows to dance across the road. He glanced at the abandoned factory to his right, over Robbie’s bobbing head. The gray building’s windows were broken. Its parking lot, overgrown with grass and weeds, now looked like a vast field.

The intersection came up fast, the light was red and Cole pulled himself to attention away from the scenery and slammed on the brakes.

“What the hell?” Robbie complained then burped.

“Simmer down, lush. We’ll be home soon.”

Across the other side of the intersection the neon lights of the strip malls reflected mesmerizing shades of color in the puddles. The light turned green and Cole pulled out into the intersection. He heard the sound of an engine gun suddenly.

A roar resounded to his left and he turned. He heard himself call out but it was already too late. A monstrous black SUV came straight at them, charging like a wild animal.

The SUV plowed into the front of their car, collapsing the front end and driver’s door, throwing the car from the road. Their car spun a complete one hundred and eighty degrees and settled at the edge of the factory’s field-like parking lot, hitting an old chain link fence. Cole heard it rattle around them. Agony gripped his left leg and he screamed. He tasted something salty in his mouth. He realized suddenly that it was blood. The windshield cracked into hundreds of spider web-like splinters. Through it, Cole watched the SUV slowly roll to the center of the intersection, straddling it just ten feet away from the front of them.

That truck… it’s beefed up or something. Cole stared at the other vehicle. The front of it was wrapped in steel bars protecting its front end and grill. Bits of glass from Robbie’s car coated the bars and the road, glinting in the streetlights. The bumpers were rubber further cushioning the SUV from damage. What is that thing, a tank? Did they do this on purpose?

Robbie moaned and stirred in his seat. Cole looked over and saw him waken. He looked unhurt. “What the Christ!” Robbie yelled. “Look what they did to my car!”

“Are you okay?” Cole asked.

“I’m fine… Jesus, look at you. Those assholes. You’re bleeding.” Robbie opened his car door.

“Robbie no… you could have internal injuries…stay in the car. Don’t move.”

“Hell with that!” Robbie started to get out of the car. Cole reached for him but the searing pain took hold of him. He grimaced and stretched.

“Robbie! I’m really hurt. I think my leg is broken.” Cole saw a figure emerge from the SUV. Something about it was familiar yet strange, disturbing. There was something threatening in its movement. Cole squinted and looked. It was a large person. Looming. Starting towards Robbie.

A bad feeling washed through Cole. Desperation set in. He pushed on the crushed driver’s side door. It didn’t move. He pushed again and again. Finally it gave way and went ajar. Cole knew his leg was broken and that he was bleeding but he could not let Robbie go blindly into whatever waited outside.

“Robbie no!” Cole screamed as he pulled himself onto the sidewalk. He crawled across broken glass, dirt and trash. His face rounded the front of his car and he saw a lone street light above him. Beneath the light the SUV waited, the large person lumbered around the side of the behemoth of a vehicle then stormed into the light.

A tall, muscular woman headed toward Robbie with a purpose, long brown hair wafting over broad shoulders, satiny blouse glowing but as she stepped into full light, Cole realized it wasn’t a woman. It was a man-man with high cheekbones and a cleft chin. Massive biceps and a heaving chest were visible through the blouse. The man did not try to hide his masculine features in the least, except for the smear of red lipstick haphazardly applied to thin lips.

He stomped toward Robbie who spouted off at him as if he was scolding a child. “You sons of bitches! Look what you did to my friend. Look what you did to my car. Don’t you fuckers know how to drive? Goddammit!”

“Bring him.” Cole heard a voice call from the SUV. “I want his eyes. He had the most beautiful eyes in the entire club.”

Without a word, the man in drag curled both hands into fists and hit Robbie across the jaw with a right hook. Robbie went down hard. He coughed once and trembled.

“Robbie!” Cole called. “You leave him alone. Fucking asshole!” Cole crawled toward them but the pain became unbearable. He froze in his spot. A scream escaped him and he grit his teeth to bite back another.

The cross-dresser kicked Robbie in the ribs with a boot and Robbie stopped moving. The man in the satiny blouse hauled him off the ground and slung him over his shoulder.

“Robbie! My God… Robbie!” Cole watched helpless, spitting blood and fearing for his own life. He watched the man carry Robbie to the SUV and throw him into its backseat. Cole saw shadows wriggling back there and a hand reached out and pulled the door shut. The huge she-man turned, glared at Cole once and walked calmly back to the front passenger’s side, climbed in and shut the door.

Cole cried out again, but it was no use. The SUV pulled away from the crossroads and drove off into the fog that blanketed the horizon. Cole’s mouth hung agape, his lips quivered, he had nearly lost his voice, his eyes welled. “Robbie…”

He pulled himself slowly back to the car to search for his cell phone.

* * *

The cast was up to his hip. Cole sat at home, recovering after a lengthy hospital stay, on disability. The police questioned him again and again. He knew they didn’t believe his story. Who would? They said they’d be back at the end of the month to see if he remembered anything more about that night. Right. They were just hoping his story would change and he would crack. He didn’t care what they thought. He remembered that night like it was yesterday.

He clicked around the web for a while, searching news reports on Yahoo, Google and MSN. There were a few police logs he managed to pull up as well. A few of them mentioned stray body parts found in the East River. Then there were the out of state stories of missing gay men, last seen at the local dives or bars—no leads, no bodies. No witnesses. There was some sort of pattern to it; some sort of trail but Cole wasn’t sure what it was. No one mentioned a cross-dresser or a rigged SUV but they were out there. He knew it.

The familiar ding of his email alerted Cole to new mail. He went to it immediately. He saw the forward mail in his inbox. The Luck Fairy again. He opened it, skimmed it, selected ten friends from his address book and hit send. Just as he did with the Light A Candle email and the Find True Love after you send to fifteen people, and the Send A Smile email, and the Send Within Five Minutes and You’ll Have Good Luck For Five Years email. He sent them all and he always would.